Hi, Clara.
This week marks the end of my state-provided disability leave under California’s standard timeline. Only seven states offer separate disability-related leave for childbirth by law—something I’m passionate about, and writing more about in a separate post. But it’s hitting me harder now that I’m a new mom navigating all of this in real-time, especially with the political climate being what it is.
This Week’s Highlights
You met my best friend—your Auntie Susan—and her family! It was so sweet seeing them meet you for the first time. Hopefully you kids will become friends one day too. We visited the local park, the one where I used to play capture the flag as a kid. Maybe you’ll run through those same grassy paths with your neighborhood crew someday.
Social visits break up the week, but honestly, I haven’t been feeling up for much lately. Outings throw off your rhythm, and mine too—your feeding, naps, and pottying shift a bit when we’re out and about. It’s a reminder of how delicate this newborn phase is.
The Nighttime Spiral
This week was tough. Nights are especially hard—your 2 a.m. wake window feels endless. You cycle through feeding, gassy tummy, gas drops, burping, rocking, bassinet, spit-up… repeat. During the day, spit-up doesn’t seem to bother you much, but at night it wakes you up and disrupts both of us.
I read somewhere that spit-up can irritate your throat, which might explain why you crave more milk afterward—to soothe the discomfort—but it just makes the cycle worse. So tonight, we’re trying the reflux prescription your pediatrician gave us. The gas drops help with your tummy, but not reflux, and they wear off so quickly.
You start thrashing and grunting around 3:30 a.m., clearly uncomfortable. I know some grunting is normal for babies, but this feels different. If things don’t improve with the meds, I’ll bring it up again with your pediatrician. It’s not sustainable for either of us.
My Check-In
I had a visit with my OB-GYN this week and ended up crying in her office. I think it’s the sleep deprivation more than anything. It’s bleeding into everything—my emotions, my energy, my sense of self.
Other Little Things
You have a faint rash on your belly, so we’re trying a double rinse in the laundry and maybe switching detergents. You also scratched yourself a few times this week (those tiny nails!), but breast milk helped, and the scratches are healing well. Your facial eczema and cradle cap are improving too.
We’re also troubleshooting room temperature at night. Our room is hot during the day and cools quickly at night, and I keep waking up wondering if you’re too hot or cold. If you snuggle with me, you get sweaty. We bought a thermometer, but it still feels like a puzzle—finding the right layering combo to keep you comfortable.
Week 6 Snapshot
- Favorite soothing method: Walking up and down the stairs while bouncing and singing.
- New this week: Daytime music for naps—nursery rhymes (I’m finally learning the lyrics), Coldplay, and a little folk music.
- Health: Belly rash, a few face scratches, improving cradle cap and facial eczema.
- Family Resemblance: This week you look especially like your Abuela Adela. And a bit like Aunt Pam from the profile! But most of all, you’re starting to look more and more like your dad.
We love you, Clara. Every week with you is hard—and beautiful—in its own way.
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